Day 1 – Leaving the US by way of NYC Newark
What can go wrong? I cannot check online all the way from San Francisco to Frankfurt. In the United App my return flight from FRA back to SFO is listed before the connection to FRA. A call last night resulted in a „call your travel agency, who booked this funny ticket.“ Clearly something to be sorted at check in.
Normally it takes me less than 10 min from the drop off through CLEAR-enhanced security. The check in and luggage drop adds another 30 today. The team of two United agents tests me well and figures out how to check my suitcase all the way to Berlin. We are opening a betting pool whether the bag wil make it across from UA to LH when in FRA.
Beautiful morning. SFO is not quite as packed as the „we recommend to be there 3 h early“ email from United had implied. The boarding planned for 6:10am starts at 6:33. Mask ratio is about 1 in 3. Good decision to upgrade myself to Premium Economy when a seat for $198 became available for this almost 6h segment. We leave SFO 16 min late, make up 11 minutes on the air for a 5 min late arrival in EWR.
Newarks Terminal C is essentially a bar‘s equivalent of a US strip mall – a set of bars and restaurants loosely connected by walk ways and places to park, um, sit. It is also a zoo today due to weather issues in the east. Why a connecting flight vs. the direct flight to Frankfurt? Well, about $1000 less expense. And who would want to miss out to be in a restaurant of the future, or hell, depending on your perspective.
The wait staff literally only delivers your food. Everything is done online and you pay (and tip) before you get the food delivered. It’s a drive-through on steroids. Four hours give you some diverse perspectives of this restaurant/hell of the future. Some people next to me at the Vanguard Kitchen‘s bar comment on the efficiency of the process, only to realize that they made a mistake in ordering and now need to talk to a human to fix it. Others hate it as they apparently like to talk to people to order. My order – bound to the seat‘s QR code where I am sitting – goes through without a hitch and infer an immediate notification via text. Not so my neighbor‘s. Her‘s is stuck and loading.
Somebody asks to scan the QR code of the seat next to me, is loud enough (in a nice way) that the person sitting there decides to leave for their plane. His app is loading. He claims to be here at the airport since 10 and the system is broken and he never got to order. He talks to the bar tender and offers cash. Bar tender refuses several times. It is getting loud enough that I offer to order through my phone – my weekly status report to my boss needs attention. What have I done? Now I am learning that he is a chef and DJ on his way to Europe to surprise friends who got surprise-married to surprise-cook for them. He also loves Berlin for its clubs, but Amsterdam is his favorite city. Sadly, I now realize that his precious attempts to get shots and cocktails can not have been unsuccessful. His double-shot of Jameson arrives from my credit card given the bar tender‘s brave defiance to accept cash. Chef/DJ thanks me, pays me, chugs the double-Jameson and leaves all within five minutes. Wow!
The bar tender comes over and jokes that this was likely a test by the company for him. Some people may have accepted the cash and had given out a free drink. Hmm. Another side effect to consider in the restaurant of hell‘s future where order taking is automated. I later run on my way to the gate into Chef/DJ, on the phone and clearly at least two further Jameson‘s in the process of his day. Doubtful that he is doing this for a living. Or it‘s good acting practice. If not, it’s bad for his liver.
We manage a 9:15 takeoff. We had left the gate at 8:30, an hour late, were then stuck in traffic at Newark. Let’s see how much we can make up on the Weybridge Frankfurt.
StageAficionado 